Having romantic relationships is a funny thing, isn't it? One minute you're the most pleasurable person to be around, and then when it all falls apart, that person has this 'inner demon' released to cause havoc.
Many relationships I have witnessed have terminated badly. Mine included. You learn so much about the person after the break up and see how they cope in these situations.
The best way to cope is move on. Couples break up for a reason and there's no point on holding on, otherwise they'd be no point in separating in the first place.
When moving on, I've learnt to never hold grudges - its a waste of energy and delays the process of enjoying life. At first, people would want to know why the split happened, but saying that you weren't right for each other or it just didn't work out makes yourself sound civilized. No matter how much you want to get the sympathy vote or how much the other half is ruining your reputation. Plus, its much shorter to say than telling the whole story.
As time moves on, my mother has always advised me to be nice if I bump into a former flame, then they wouldn't have an excuse to be ill-mannered about you to others and it offers a glimpse of maturity by accepting the fact it's over.
There are many reasons to breaking up such as cheating. This is a massive deal breaker for most as it is pretty unprofessional to go and inflict pain on another. However, this goes back to holding grudges, most couples I've seen that have been cheated on are very young, and most don't understand that some people aren't meant to be. Some were unfortunate to find out that way. When you are that young and have been betrayed, you forget that opportunity of finding love again is there, you delve into the past for suspicious clues, you moan to your friends about how much of a coward he is, or how you refer to his new love as a promiscuous female. I've never been cheated on but these are the signs that I have observed. This is not an indication of moving on. It's unhealthy.
The results of cheating can be worse afterwards. The culprit can lose respect and therefore, lose their friends. I don't condone cheating at all but wishing death upon the cheat and his new love is a terrible phrase to commit. Never wish someone dead. Stupid thing to say. Mistakes are bound to happen. More frequently when you're young because you're more foolish, but you learn from them. And that is the key point I keep on making, you're still young.
Relationships aren't always easy, but if your former partner has formed a bond with someone or moved on before you, then it's not worth the effort to defame their name. They're not your issue anymore, and you shouldn't be their problem either.
It's always best to make the same mistake three or four times before you get it right.
