Dear Ex No.1...

I don’t know where to begin. I guess at ‘Hi'. This will be one of the most difficult letters to write. Probably because you are my first love and will always have a spot in my heart.

I don’t know what happened with us. I don’t see our past relationship as a failed one. We were very young and fell in love. It was my first time falling in love and it was quite an adventure. Our two and a half years together was very special. Of course like any couple, we had our ups and downs but I don’t regret our time with each other. 

When I first saw you, I thought you were lovely and tall. And then we started talking to each other and meeting up and I thought your blue eyes were the most beautiful things I had ever seen. The only reason we ever got together was because our friend and I’m very grateful she helped us along the way. 

You made me laugh, feel butterflies, happiness and just pure love. I knew it was serious when we took our relationship to the next level. I don't feel regret.

You made me overcome my fear of dogs when I had to confront your 3 big dogs at your house. I was crapping myself. They were jumping and being excited and my fear was getting jumped on again. But they were lovely. Kinda. Still crapping myself after meeting them. 

Meeting your parents was scary too. First time meeting the boyfriend’s parents but they were very welcoming and lovely. Like you. You were always lovely to me, especially your hand drawn cards you created for my birthdays, Valentine’s and anniversaries. 

But something felt different nearer to the end of our relationship.

I don’t know what it was but it didn’t feel the same. You weren’t the man I fell in love anymore. You were drifting away from me. But I still held on. When it came to breaking up, I realised afterwards that you were the one who broke it off with me. At first, I thought it was mutual, but the realisation hit hard. I experienced my first ever heartbreak. It sucked. And then you got a girlfriend afterwards, the sucking got worse. 

The attempt to move on was difficult. Our relationship came to a halt. You were moving on before I could even grasp that we had even broken up. But by then, you could do what you wanted, you weren’t mine anymore.

It’s been nearly 4 years since we ended. Time’s flown. We’re probably quite different people now compared to our 15-year-old selves. Seeing you recently has made me miss the friendship and the good times that we had. But I also remember the bad, which stops me from thinking any further. 

There were so many things I wished for during and after our relationship and what could've been different, but that's all in the past now. I guess we were never meant to be and I've accepted that. 

You were a good boyfriend and I'm glad you were mine once. I wish you the best of luck in the future. Take care.

All the love from, Isobel x

Dear Self...

I don’t know how to start this. You’ve gone through so much already. 

School. College. Love. And now university. Even though you haven’t travelled as much as you have liked or gotten the needed experience already for work, you’ve done a lot more than you think. 

Growing up was a test. You had to deal with racism, as well as people saying you were ugly. But you weren’t ugly on the inside. Remember that. Looks can only go so far. You were just shy and needed coming out of your shell and eventually, the outside matched the inside. If you are patient, time will be good to you. 

You can do anything you want. You have a loving family supporting you, even when they are being critical or telling you to “get over it", they are only doing this so you can better yourself and be tougher. To prove that you can be better. Growing up in an asian family is hard, especially when the expectations of you is either to be a lawyer or a doctor. But that’s because they don’t want you to become poor. Or be working in a takeaway forever. But you didn’t take this route, you took the route to be a writer. To be a good journalist one day. Your skill is in writing. Not science. Not maths. And definitely not law. I think they know that.

Outside of academia, you’ve gone through periods, boys and tantrums. And you have your family to thank for helping you calm down during those episodes, especially your mum and dad. They are your voice of wisdom and common sense when you can’t handle things or being unreasonable. When you went through your first period, your mum was there. When you went through your first heartbreak, your whole family was there for you. Feeding chocolate and giving you a Bridget Jones film to watch. And when you got accepted into university, everybody was there for you. Friends and family. You’ve got so much support without realising. 

I know you’ve lost many friends over the years due to drifting apart or your decision to cut negative people out of your life, so only a few still exist.

So for the ones that are still around, don’t take their company for granted. Call them up to meet, say hello, converse, eat with them! And if that doesn’t work out with old friends, you can always meet new friends. Not the end of the world if you’re "Billy No Mates".

You’re still so young. Only 21. So don’t panic when something doesn’t go right. You’ve got time. But don’t take your time either, otherwise nothing will be done. Always strive for success. And make your family proud. They didn’t work their whole lives for no reason. They’ve done it for their children’s future. To make sure we are safe. 

I know you will always be worrying about you and your surroundings but being worried is okay. You’re not married or a mother so you’ve got nothing to worry about apart from yourself. You are not ready for that responsibility yet, but the time will come. During the mean time, take care of yourself; see the world; get an amazing job. Fulfil your needs so you can be satisfied within yourself. Don’t let the fear get to you. Everything will fall into place. 

Stop doubting yourself. Life is a learning curve. 

Love Me x

Things That Happen On Trains.

I travel on trains frequently and when a situation occurs, my mind goes into overload and think things that you wouldn't say in public. Funny things, obviously.

WARNING: May contain swearing, judging, hunger, impatience, lots of exclamation marks and capitalisation.

Enjoy.

#1 WHEN YOU CAN'T UNDERSTAND THE MAN OVER THE TANNOY
Man: Welcome aboard the South West train service to London Waterloo. There has been a slight delay due to a gidnfbhjvdnsasdkjfnadjfbnvajsdfbnvjdafnb.

Mind: Eh? What did he say? WHAT'S DA DELAY?

Man: ...Thank you for your patience.

Mind: OI GET BACK HERE! I DIDN'T HEAR WHAT YOU SAID!

Mind: GURL, this better not make me miss breakfast hour at McDonalds. 

#2 WHEN A SMELLY PERSON SITS NEXT TO YOU
Man: Can I sit here please?

Mind: NOPE.

Mouth: Of course.

Mind: Dammit, why are we British too polite?!

Mind: Oh god, he stinks.

Mind: Is my perfume on me? (Rummages through bag, item not found)... NOOOOO!

Mind: Oh my god, am I gonna die? Is this how I die? Suffocation of bad odour?

Mind: The windows aren't open. I'm gonna kill somebody.

Mind: Hold. Your. Breath.

Mind: Why don't they provide oxygen masks on trains like they do on planes? THIS IS AN EMERGENCY SITUATION!

Mind: Is he moving?

Mind: OMG it's his stop!

Mind: But he's left his smell behind.

Mind: NOOOOOO!

#3 WHEN SOMEONE SITS NEXT TO YOU AND FALLS ASLEEP TRAPPING YOU IN
Mind: Aww aren't they cute sleeping?

Mind: Wait, they're sleeping?

Mind: No, no, no don't fall asleep!

Mind: Are they asleep?

Mind: Knew I should've sat on the outside.

Mind: Shall I tap them? Is it rude to wake them up?

Mind: OMGMYSTOPISNEXTOMGMYSTOPISNEXTOMGMYSTOPISNEXT

Mind: Well, that's final then. I'm off to Scotland. 

#4 CARRYING LOTS OF BAGS AFTER SHOPPING AND TRYING TO FIND A SEAT
Mind: Wow, it's busy today.

Mind: Oh god there's so many people.

Mind: Right, easy does it Isobel.

Victim #1: Ow!

Mouth: SORRY!

Mind: Oh god I just hit an old granny! I hope that didn't hurt too much.

(LIFTS BAGS HIGHER)

Victim #2: Oh Jesus! (Moves out of the way)

Mind: Eeek eek sorry, sorry, sorry! Why did I decide to go shopping today?!

(A FOOD TROLLEY COMES ALONG)

Mind: What the fuck, well bitch I ain't moving.

(A FEW SECONDS LATER)

Mind: Ok, I'll move. 

#5 NO SEATS/ROOM ON TRAIN SO RESORTED TO STANDING OUTSIDE THE TOILET
Mind: Jeez, I hope no one needs the toilet, they can hold it in right?

Mind: Nope, someone's going in, someone must hate me right now.

(STANDS OUT OF THE WAY, PERSON GOES IN)

(10 MINUTES PASS)

Mind: They've been in there for a while. They better not be doing a shit.

(HEARS THE TOILET FLUSH)

Mind: Oh god hold your breath.

(PERSON COMES OUT LOOKING EMBARRASSED AND WADDLES AWAY)

Mind: They didn't close the door!

Mind: Oh god, I held my breath too early I NEED TO BREATHE

(I LET GO AND STARTING BREATHING)

Mind: OH MY FUCKING GOD IT STINKS! And I can't move on this sardine train!

(SHUTS THE TOILET DOOR, A FEW SECONDS LATER ANOTHER PERSON WALKS IN)

Mind: Yup, someone is really hating on me right now.

#6 WHEN PASSENGERS STARE AT YOU
Mind: Eh? Is that person looking at me?

Mind: Oh dear lord they're looking.

Mind: Do I have something on my face? (Looks at phone quickly) Nope nothing.

Mind: Maybe it's something next to me? (Looks out the window) Nope, just trees.

Mind: Oh dear they're still looking.

Mind: So rude to stare...they can't be British

Mind: Do I stare back? Is this some sort of war going on that I'm not aware of?

Mind: This is a serious case of being a weirdo.

Mind: Fuck it, let's glare back. 

Mind: Nope, they haven't budged.

Mind: Maaaaaan, I must be fine looking today (Looks at phone again) Nope that's not it.

Mind: Ok they're still staring. Right that's it. I'm going to say something.

(TRAIN STOPS AND PERSON GETS OFF AT DESTINATION)

Mind: Ok, maybe not.

#7 OVERHEARING A GIRL FLIRTING WITH A BOY
Mind: Mate, this is cringey. 

Mind: What is she wearing?

Mind: She's only 16? Don't think she should be wearing a skirt that short.

Mind: Bloke seems alright, reciprocating back to her.

Mind: Oh my god, was that her laugh? Was that her flirty laugh?

Mind: Oh my god, was I like this at 16?

Mind: Jeez, I hope not.

Mind: Oh hang on wait...yeah I think I was.

Mind: Wow, that's embarrassing looking back.

Mind: You what mate? You're into weird shit? Should you be telling a guy this? Should I be listening to this anymore?

Mind: Fuck it, I've got another 10 minutes on this train.

#8 DISLIKE OF USING TRAIN TOILETS
Mind: Oh dear, I really need the toilet...

Mind: Dammit body, why do you want to do a number two at this very moment?! WHY NOT AT HOME?

Mind: Breathe, breathe. It's alright, only an hour on the train.

Mind: But can I really hold it in that long?

Mind: This. Is. Uncomfortable.

Mind: Shall I go to the toilets on the train?

Mind: Hmm, I could go...

Mind: Oh god, what if the train leaves without me?

Mind: Nope. Not going.

#9 WHEN OVERHEARING A TEENS CONVERSATION
Mind: Oh? What are they talking about? 

Mind: Fifty Shades? Whipping? Canes?

Mind: Oh bless, they think they know what they're talking about.

Mind: Jeez, why are they so loud? I'm sure the old lady near them doesn't want to hear about butt plugs.

Mind: Or does she? HAHAHAHA.

Mind: Blimey, why are there so many of them? 

Mind: Why is that girl trying to sound older by talking about sex out loud?

Mind: She's annoying.

Mind: Stop talking, please. You've probably never touched a willy in your life. 

Mind: Oh dear god, the whole carriage is going to know about what you get up to within these 20 minutes.

Mind: Do you know what? Why don't you ask the ticket man whether you can speak over the tannoy, it wouldn't make a difference at the volume you're speaking at. 

Mind: Man, I sound grumpy. Am I on my period this week?

Mind: Nope. I'm just hungry. Get me off this train. 

#10 SEEING A COUPLE SHOWING PDA
(COUPLE SITS IN TWO SEATER NEAR ME)

Mind: Aww they seem cute.

Mind: Lalalalalalalalalalala....oh looking they're kissing.

(LOOKS OUT THE WINDOW)

Mind: Oh dear, this seems awkward.

(LOOKS BACK)

Mind: Oh wow, they're really going for it and they've only been on the train for a minute.

Mind: Wonder where they are going?

Mind: Shit man, it's like they haven't seen each other in a while.

Mind: Oh my god, why am I looking? QUICK LOOK AT PHONE!

Mind: Do they know I'm here?  

Mind: Oh my...

Mind: I hope I'm not part of some voyeurism shit.

Mind: ....Are they still kissing?

Mind: Well. Yup. That's what my eyes see. He's groping her boob. Nope. Boobs. Plural. 

Mind: Maybe he was trying to grab her face and it accidentally slipped. I DON'T KNOW IT COULD HAPPEN! I WASN'T WATCHING.

Mind: Eeeek, they're making noises. 

(LOOKS OUT THE WINDOW AGAIN)

Mind: Yup, this is what I'm gonna have to do for the rest of the journey.

Mind: Hmm, I wonder what I shall have for lunch.

(GOES THROUGH TUNNEL)

Mind: Oh god the windows have gone black. OMG I can see them in the reflection.

Mind: I CAN'T ESCAPE THEM!

Mind: When this is over, I'm going blog about this shit. 

Piglet: How Do You Spell Love? ------------------ Pooh: You Don't Spell It, You Feel It.

In a relationship? Want to spread the news on how happy you are and how fantastic your partner is? Of course you do. But when does it start bordering on annoying, in which you then begin questioning why they keep doing it?

There are many people on Facebook who gush about their boyfriend/girlfriend or post the occassional "I love you" on their partner's wall for all the world to see, depicting a very lovey-dovey couple that we would imagine. But then I wonder if it is something much deeper like a cover up because most people do that in order to maintain a illusion that their relationship is somewhere far from okay.

And what if they are okay? Well, then I start to question other platform of communication e.g. text, WhatsApp, Facebook Messenger, Skype, a phone call - Are they all broken? Do they not fit your means of standard whereby you have to post how much you love them online? Why does the whole world need to see you write three affectionate words in such a public manner?

Sure you get the exceptions - i.e. my parents - I have to let these guys off to be honest, they are my parents after all. They are one of the soppiest human beings I know - My mum puts up love quotes [one a day for all those lucky people who are friends with her, two if she's generous] dedicated to my father and he reciprocates the feelings through YouTube videos featuring love songs from their decade. It's sweet really with the given nicknames such as "Boo Boo" aka my dad, but my exposure to their fairytale doesn't stop there - they smooch, cuddle and laugh at each other and I can see, that they are happy online and also behind the scenes.

But what about the couples who aren't happy as they seem online? I know a few couples who argue all the time and not at all that happy within their relationship due to the mounting of issues and yet, they still post about how happy they are. Is it denial that's happening? With that many people apparently knowing how content you are, is it just maintaining that facade, in case of letting them down? We will never know. 

People who brag about how amazing their partner is on a daily/weekly basis do get noticed, but only when it stops. There's nothing more strange than a couple, who were soppy as hell a week ago, have now disappeared from your newsfeed. Of course we get worried because we haven't heard from them in what seems like years and so, the next step after getting all hot and bothered is to check out their profile, and a majority of the time, lo' and behold, they've broken up. Ah! An answer!
Right, this is why you don't publicly declare your love all the time, people won't take notice when you're typing away saying "I love you so much, you're my world, you're my everything" when in fact your partner is actually in earshot of you saying it, instead the user's attention would be focused on your lack of presence online.

This reminds me of when Peter and I went on holiday to Gran Canaria last year and there was this young couple who arrived the same time as us and we saw them by the pool and at dinner everyday, and the one thing that they always did was kiss. Never separated. They were act it like teens - and there were bloody children around as well. It was just fascinating watching them kiss non-stop, and then, we saw them one evening and they weren't kissing! Me and Peter were so baffled, we wondered whether they were feeling ill. We noticed that when they weren't kissing, they looked miserable. They didn't look too happy eating food either. And if they're not happy eating food with their loved one beside them, then they are not truly happy. Food and sex makes everybody happy. Yah?

Anyway, it can get annoying. The thing is, people don't need to see how amazing your boyfriend/girlfriend is by spamming it online daily - that's not #1 priority. My boyfriend and I don't send each other things like that online, it's more of a private matter when sending our love - i.e. phone calls/messenger. Unless it's our anniversary so I'll put something up once a year. Which is coming up, so beware. 

Another thing is what about your single friends on Facebook? How do they feel? Consider those who don't have a partner. Sure it might be their choice that they want to eat Ben & Jerry's alone but then again, what if they are trying to find love but failing? It can be hard for some. 

*Sigh* What I'm trying to say is, don't spread your love to prove something - people will see through it. And try not to make statements that you're going to be "2Getha 4Eva" - you're not teenagers anymore. Perhaps I'm too cynical - I do adore a love story but there's a point where we are all going to overdose from it on Facebook.  

Also, I found this though. Credit to Sarcasm_Only on Instagram. 

Therefore, if you break up - people would not suspect a thang! 

Happy August everyone!

Is Facebook Our New Best Friend?

We treat Facebook as the only source of communication and a form of escapism. It's our little sidekick tucked into the comforts of our pocket or our handbag - well, until we whip it out because apparently we have something the whole world needs to hear. Facebook asks their users on the status tab 'What's on your mind?' but is this sort of encouragement ever a good idea? 

The Problems
Users will treat this as one way of being social, but are we really being that social in a way that we would rather talk to our friends through a messenger, than to their face? Has Facebook somehow made us anti-social at the same time? I think so. 

The "social" networking site relies on people saying what's on their mind, sharing their business and one of the results is 'likes'. The importance of how many 'likes' you get is pretty high. One easy click is enough to make the user think that whatever they say, confirms their importance in your life (perhaps) - therefore whatever they say is gold. The more likes you get, the more popular you seem. 

However, users checking every 15 minutes to see how many 'likes' they have can take over one's life. But it's not just the 'likes' that keeps their attention away from reality - it's also their nosiness and Facebook "stalking". If their face wasn't always so glued to their phone, their attention would be on someone else (e.g. girlfriend, boyfriend, mother, father, teacher, daughter, son, dog) and that's how it should be, but instead they feel ignored and lost. No point trying to talk to them thinking they are listening because 10 minutes later when their face is no longer a glowing blue, you get the delayed 'Huh?'.

Another issue is the sharing. I know it's there for friends and family to give an insight into your life if you don't see each other very often, but what about the people you never speak to or see at all? All they're doing now is being nosey buggers. Why are they on your friends list in the first place? But if people do see their friends or family, what are they going to talk about? Nothing. The conversation would usually start off as "Oh, saw that status of yours on Facebook" or "Nice holiday photos". 

You see, when this site wasn't available to us, people would meet up with their friends that they hadn't seen in a while and produce actual photographs of whatever they've been up to, for instance, a holiday. They would spend hours going through the photos in the flesh and the meeting would be an actual catch up. But now, everything is online. Everyone can see. No need to ask. They're like the acquaintance who knows everything. Even what time you take a shit. 

Deleting/unfollowing people has been quite liberating and I've done it for these reasons:
1) I don't talk to them.
2) They don't talk to me.
3) Random people.
4) Reunion - If I ever had one in 10 years time, can you imagine how silent the room would be because everyone knows everything about you? 
5) They talk absolute rubbish.

Point #5 is a big one. People moan a lot on Facebook. They treat it as their diary. What they say is really pointless too (e.g. "I hate Mondays" - Why? 'Cos everyone else does?) and it's unnecessary information cluttering my newsfeed. I sound like a grumpy moo and I don't mind status', that's the point of Facebook. But some reveal too much, repeat themselves or go on and on about some shit. I did some research and here are some of the most commonly seen status':

• Selfies
• I'm always ill
• I'm always depressed
• Copying cheesy quotes
• The 'Like for Hot or Not'
• I'm always drunk snaps
• Holiday photos - These aren't bad
• Cars
• 'I Hate Mondays'
• Soppy relationship posts about/to another
• I'm always skint
• Baby photos, followed by an engagement
• Food photos - Some look ok, some make me drool bad
• God
• "Granddad, you've been gone for 8 years, 2 months, 5 days and 3 hours. We miss you." - I may be steering towards insensitive here but this isn't Facebook material. Should be mourned in private
• Just pure moaning. Imagine if Moaning Myrtle had Facebook. She'd have no friends.

I'm not totally innocent though, I do the odd food photo or selfie but that's like once in a blue moon - I think, I could be lying. But the others? Who needs this crap? Some crap is good though, the baby photos are adorable and I love seeing where people have travelled around the world, but the rest is kinda blah. People use Facebook as a ground to stand on to see what we have in common with these people. And most of the time, it's just funny memes that connect people to one another which is really cool. Other times, it's just people not happy with their lives and it seems like friends don't have the heart to delete them on Facebook because they want to hear the gossip - the "What's up hun? Message me" crap goes on automatic. You what mate? If you were that close in the first place, he or she would've been the first people you would've contacted, instead of resorting to a site full of strangers. They don't need to know, will your news affect them? Probably not, unless it's close family but then you would keep the issue private. These people should get paid for the amount of status' they put up or how much they reveal daily.

The Benefits
However, Facebook is not all doom and gloom, it has its positives too. The sharing part is also great if you don't see family/friends who are either abroad or immobile (e.g flu or old), especially the elderly who probably find getting to places and seeing people a struggle.

It's a good platform to start up friendships that you thought would never happen, for instance, classmates you never spoke to at school is now classed as your best friend, 20 years on.

It's also good for exposing your work that needs that little 'oomph' in the world. Many use Facebook to create an image for themselves through promotional pages or sharing links to an external site, for example, a blog. We need to start somewhere and the internet is an easy platform to begin with. I do need the internet and Facebook for the field of work that I want to go into but I don't want to be glued like when I was younger. I had my teenage years of experiencing technology - I will admit, MSN and Bebo were my life, I was obsessed and looking back, I realise I was very engrossed in my phone and didn't make any conversations with my family. That realisation scared me because I have wasted so many years just being attached to my phone and being the internet.

Overall?
Facebook should be about sharing your good news, funny shit and joy, but then again, who's going to feed off that? Society likes to get their energy and kick off the depressed and unsuccessful. Sad eh? It needs to change.

Sharing your achievements in your life so far can also be rewarding when people take notice - like it was worth it. But you don't need to rely on people to congratulate you - if you feel good within yourself, you don't need that seal of approval from people you don't know. You would know it within yourself. You just share the news because you feel so happy. Whether you get likes or not. It's just a middle finger up to self doubt, like confirmation.

All I just want to say, after all this mumbling, is that Facebook isn't your life. Yes, you include it into your daily routine like brushing your teeth but I think people need to be desensitised about Facebook because right now, it's treated as one big show. And we're its puppets. 

My Teenage Years Vs My Little Sisters

There is 8 years difference between me and sister. Only 8 years but you wouldn't be able to tell - she's the same height as me. She's 13 at the moment (turning 14 in August) and since she's now classed as a teen, I've realised that she won't be having the same experiences that I had gone through. Here's a few:

• MSN - This messenger was our life! The one thing that stood out was the emoticons that replaced every single word. Such an effort to read.

• Internet - Today, we have WiFi. Back then, we had this cable shit where we had to share this singular wire that would only provide internet for one computer at a time. Tough times. 

• Flip phones - Actually, forget the flip phones, I remember the BRICKS. Thick ass phones that resembled a shoe. And then flip phones came into fashion and I loved them. You drop your flip phone? Only the outside is scratched. You drop your iPhone? Everything is broke. Loooong gone. 

• MP3 and CD players - I loved my little MP3 - None of that error shit I get with my iPhone when I want to put music on. A bugger carrying portable CD players though. And carrying the actual CD too. That's why mother's bags are so big - they be carrying all those Cee-Deeees. 

• Limewire - This was the software where you would download free music illegally. I could download anything from it. Whereas now with iTunes if I wanted a song, it's harder now due to availability. Limewire made things accessible.

• 90s - This ranges from music (like Britney, Backstreet Boys, Celine Dion ballads, Aqua) to fashion (like Jelly shoes). Hairstyles count too.

• Bebo - Started in 2005, this became THE social media site to be on. Like Facebook, but quirkier. The skins were amazing. Made all of mine on Paint. So hard. 

• Racism - Witnessing my sister going to Primary and now Secondary school, I think the racism has toned down and much better than when I was at school. I loathed Primary school. I didn't like going - I had to face daily racism from stupid people - ranged from people not sitting next to me to boys mimicking karate moves in front of me. All because of my race. It was sad. I never told my mother. They made me feel ashamed that I was Chinese. I know now that I should have told my mother - I was only under 11 when these things happened. I shouldn't have fought it alone. So when my sister went to Primary, I was very wary and felt over-protective of her because of what I went through. I still am. Only last year she had a couple of boys racially abuse her and of course, we stepped in. 

• Innocence - I've heard various stories that girls this young have had intercourse, doing drugs and smoking - You what mate? At 13, I played with Tamagotchis and collected Pokemon cards. They want to grow up too fast. 

• Chalkboards - Messy as fuck. Makes you look like you've been raiding the crack cupboard when the chalk powder goes all over the place.

There's probably more that I have missed out but these are the things that stood out for me. It's just weird how times change. And my little baby is growing up so fast. Waaa. 

What I've Learnt In University So Far.

I'm nearing to the end of second year and here are some of the things you learn or pick up on the way. 

• Twitter - People use this to vent their emotions about other people or how they're feeling. Cryptic in a way that it doesn't obviously mention people's names but at the same time not cryptic enough, especially if you've annoyed them 5 minutes before and coincidentally an angry tweet pops up. I don't think there's any need for them. People on Twitter can be quite unnecessarily mean so I usually try and stay away from it. 

• University is like a school playground. When you're a kid in Secondary school, you have the usual cliques and the gangs and the same applies here. It is school second time round but this time, you know what to do or who to be friends with at university. 

• But then again, you also don't know who your friends are. Friends go into different career directions or go onto higher education, I guess it's inevitable that people will drift apart. From having friends at school and college to people you never speak to anymore. Luckily I'm still in touch with a few but I only have about a few, maybe even a couple of best friends and that's it. The rest are strangers. 

• Naps are the best thing in the world! You appreciate sleep so much. 

• It seems that the most important lessons are at 9am. Why. I don't know. Which leads on to my next point.

• You feel very guilty when you oversleep and miss a lesson. In school? Yeah, not a problem. In college? They'll probably repeat the lesson again. At university? No, no I can't afford to. Plus, they would've have probably mentioned something really important in the lesson, typically when you're still snoring your head off and you're too ashamed to ask your classmate what happened in the lesson in case they get annoyed.

• I would rather spend money on food than alcohol. Everyone raved about the amount of times they went out during 1st and even 2nd year but I love my food more than anything. 

• It's a tough balance between being social, whilst doing work, maintaining a relationship and wanting space to chill on your own. People will call you unsociable or boring for it but sometimes sacrifices have to be made to do work. 

• One thing about being in a relationship at university: If your boyfriend lives only 20 seconds away or living with you, you kinda end up feeding for him too. It's a fact. You gotta stock up on food. The baby needs feeding. 

• You cry often about work. At the beginning, I thought it was a bad thing to cry about coursework but sometimes you just gotta let it out because it builds up so much. The only people I cry to though is my boyfriend and my mum. They're my best friends. 

• I've mastered this since Primary school but you learn to enjoy yourself. People won't be there for you so you rely on yourself. Being alone isn't as bad as you think. I know some people can't stand it but I think it is a skill that needs to be learnt.

• You become more confident. You can talk to people. I go out with my hair all over the place. It's the smallest things that make a difference to you. You also decide to take on responsibility. I took a leap last year and put myself forward to be an editor of the student magazine because I joined a media society and now we have two issues out. It's a lot of hard work but I'm hoping it'll be all worth it in the end. You end up being responsible for other people and helping them progress and add to their CV is a great feeling.

• You find out people don't know the simple things in life. Like where a stamp goes on an envelope or taking the bins out. I remember someone told me that their housemate had placed his bacon in the cupboard because his mother used to cook for him all the time so he didn't know where it went. If a situation like that emerges, just gently guide them on their way. No harm in helping them. It's just a shame the parents didn't guide them well enough to know these things. 

• You get the odd stressy student who needs calming down. All they need is a cup of tea and some chocolate and tell them that everything is going to be okay. Because everything will be. All this stress will be worth it. 

• I've learnt that within friendships, it's commonly okay to tease and be horrible to your friend. It's humorous and fine. 

• You really need work experience. Waaaaaa. I'm working on it. 

• Failure isn't the end of the world. Everything is a learning curve and you just got to do better next time. Don't beat yourselves up about a low grade or a failed unit, stand strong and move forward. 

See, I look back at this and wonder what lies ahead for me in 3rd year. I'm hoping it won't be as long as this post right here. But you never know, I could fuck everything up by then.