Using My Phone In Public.

It's a really bizarre feeling when you're not on your phone and um, everyone else is. 

It's like they're zombies, except they're not after your brains and they constantly bump into you or stand there like a numpty. And I wonder, do I do that??

When I see everyone on their phones out in public, I instantly put my away if it's out. Candy Crush Soda can wait until later.

I feel it can be embarrassing because you're all doing to the same activity. 

When was the last time people actually spoke to each other? I don't think I've look someone in the eye in a long time. Apart from my boyfriend, I stare into his eyes. 

EVERY. SINGLE. NIGHT. 

Jokes. I'm normally asleep before him. He would stare at me instead when I'm sleeping. 

I go into a cafe, a park, walk through town, be in a classroom - everyone is the same. It's like our phones have us under hypnosis. My mother is a victim. And my father. They cannot be away from their phones. They get the shakes. 

What we've been doing recently when we have dinner out is put our phones in the middle of the table. Good idea tbh. Only because my mother likes to go on her phone, we tell her to get off it because it's rude and she replies with, 'Why, what are we going to talk about?' and carries on talking to her friends online. You'd think she was a teenager. We don't know what to say to that response, just can't believe she says it. 

WE FAMILY! WE TALK ABOUT ANYTHING!

*sigh* Ah well. 

YouTube Comments Are Mean.

I am an avid watcher on YouTube. 

I've been on YouTube since 2007 and the comment section recently is shocking. The YouTube community is meant to be full of support and love but it really isn't the case anymore.

Young YouTubers such as Zoella and PointlessBlogTV - they get hate. They let people over the Internet have an insight into their private lives and what do they do in return? Judgement.

With Zoella, she left the Internet for a few days because it was getting too much. She released a book then admitted that she had a ghost writer and then people started bashing her. I can understand why these haters can be so overwhelming and just bad for YouTube.

With YouTubers who are parents like AprilJustinTV, itsJudyTime, Bubzvlogs - also bloggers and yet, people over the Internet were telling them how to raise their child. Even though the users were not parents and they were also very young. They were quick to judge other people, even though they have no knowledge in the area. It's also not their kid. 

They're all unnecessary comments. People have the mightiest ego in front of the computer but if they ever were to meet these YouTubers, I bet they wouldn't even say anything. 

I've started making videos and I don't know how I'm going to feel when I get my first hate. Hopefully I won't. But my videos aren't going anywhere so that's okay. 

But seriously, when you write a nasty comment - who is it going to help? You? Oh well then good for you. These YouTubers willingly put their lives out on the Internet and then get told off for living the way they do. 

So many Internet users are so ungrateful. They hate what they are watching and yet they are too nosey to stop. Oh, and they've also got to write a comment just in case the YouTube doesn't know how much they hate the video.

Seriously? You must know every YouTuber reads their comments. 

One good thing about these comments is that I can use them for my dissertation. An insight into the commentary. The good and the bad. 

Teenagers.

ENLIGHTMENT: 

I WROTE THIS WHEN I WAS ANNOYED IN 2014 BUT STILL APPLIES TO ALL TEENAGERS. 

Teenagers. Are. Horrible.

Was I horrible as a teen? Probably. 

Their attitude, the way they walk, the way they talk to people, the apparent "unfairness" about things in life, the constant wasting of food like money appears in thin air - no sense of value in money. 

Is it the parents fault? Or the older sibling's duty to make sure they don't end up like this? 
Or are they programmed to be like this?

You warn them about strangers, staying out late, friends and "older" boys but they brush you off like a piece of dirt under their newly bought AirMaxs. And then the inevitable happens? You burst out crying about a situation that we warned you about? No. Had enough. The only way you will learn is to experience it.

Having a 13-year-old sister is hard. Really hard. 

We tell her not to wear make-up because it clogs up your skin and makes your skin shit in the future. 
But you never listen.
Now you have what I like to call 'make-up spots' - where a cluster of bumps gather on your skin (mainly on forehead and cheeks) due to the amount of crap your face has to deal with. And the only way to hide those spots is with more make-up. A nasty cycle. 

We tell her not to wear skimpy clothes and high heels because she is 13 and therefore it would be inappropriate for her to be looked at.
She says she forgets she's really young and thinks she's 16. But no, you are not.
You are what we class as 'jailbait'.
I feel sorry for the man who will look at you thinking you are 18, when in fact you are way below the legal age - and then he will feel dirty and get backlash for looking at you, even though this information was not presented to him. But I will still stare him down - it's protective instincts. 
You are not 18 yet. Get a grip.

We tell her to help out around the house. Her face drops. It's like we have asked her to do the most cruelest job around. Why? We all had to do jobs in order to get pocket money. She gets annoyed when we shout as if she's done nothing wrong. Don't pull a strop young lady - we're only asking for your help. 

We tell her not to drop her new phone. She drops it without care. It previously belonged to my dad, no scratches. She has it, covered in it. She drops it like she has a new phone on the way. No, you don't. I don't know whether this is our fault, we spoil her and now she doesn't know how precious money is. Teenagers know they have to earn what they want but they want it given at the same time.

We warn her about so-called friends she has, saying that they can be bitches and are not what they seem. She ignores us. Insisting that she knows them very well and that they wouldn't do that. Are you sure? You have two generations telling you what we know from experience and yet you brush us off like we don't know anything? Mate, open your eyes. We can foresee the future.

We warn her not to do something, but then you do it. We take your phone away, your internet and ground you from going out. You feel like we're taking your life away. We're not. It's discipline. You're only 13. Your life doesn't stop at 13. 

We tell you that you are beautiful the way you are and that you should be proud of your heritage. 
But you always keep wishing for things.

Wishing you were American.
Wishing you had an American accent.
Wishing you were taller.
Wishing you were thinner.
Wishing you were older. 
Wishing you had nicer teeth.
Wishing you were more Asian.
Wishing you could speak Korean.
Wishing you were Korean.

How do you think that affects us? Are you not proud of being Chinese? Don't you think Chinese is a beautiful language too? For God's sake, you're only 13! Some of things you wish for will fall into place as you grow, but all I hear is moan, moan, moan. Is life that unfair to you right now? Things teenagers wish for can be shallow. 

I feel frustrated and fed up all the time with her behaviour.

Our grandfather came to England to earn money and to provide a better life for his family. 
He worked very hard. He opened up the takeaway in 1975 and it has been our life since. We have worked here to build up a work ethic and money to get out of this sort of business. Do you want to work at the takeaway forever? The answer is no. Don't take things for granted. 

This doesn't just apply to my sister. This will apply to all teenagers.

Parents and relatives will teach teenagers morals and life lessons, for them to get the automatic, "Whatever". Teenagers will go through similar situations like the ones I have given up until they are 18/19, which is when they either go to university or get a job. The realisation will hit them that their family have been only protecting and guiding them through life, even though it may seem like constant nagging. 

I love my sister dearly. Even though there is an eight year age gap, I treat her like my best friend. 
She asks a question, I tell her the truth. No sugar coating. 
She wishes for things? I reassure her that her time will come or that she should be proud of how she is. But that reassurance is never enough to make them feel content at that age because it doesn't seem believable. 

Being 18 seems like light-years away but it will come like tomorrow. 

Plans For After University?

I DON'T KNOW!

I don't really believe how quickly it has come around. When I was a first year, I thought, 'Mate, we've got ages yet." WRONG!

I'm going to be graduating this year and I get asked this every single time by a different person.

So, what are your plans for after your degree?

Gulp. *run away*

In all honesty, I don't know. Internships? Jobs? Work abroad? So many choices. My approach is usually see what happens or what comes my way but I know it will not work that way. 

I've been applying but it's still scary. 

My worry is that my degree won't be useful or I won't be in an area that I studied for. It does happen so I'm prepared for it. 

I do wish I was more organised and had something planned out. We're all so concentrated with essays and making the most out of university that we forget about the life after. Or we're in denial. Could be all of it.

Can I just take a nap instead? Plez. 

Do I Want A Baby Now?

I did a video on this a while ago about why I didn't want a baby right now. I thought it wasn't controversial because I am 22 after all and I thought I had explained myself clearly as to why it would not be convenient. Turns out some people took it the wrong way. Typically, it was the pregnant ones that kicked off or the ones that were already young mothers. 

I'm not too sure why they kicked off to be honest. I was stating why I didn't want one now. Like I said, I'm 22 and nearly finished university - imagine if I decided I want a baby now after completing a degree and not making use of it? I'm in a job mindset, not baby mindset. I want to travel, leave my small town, enjoy a career and myself. That has been my mother's goal and I can see why she encouraged me to go to university and not have a baby yet. My mother had me when she was 22 or 23 (can't remember) and even though I brought light into her life, she admits she was very young and wouldn't want me to repeat history.

Since I'm still a student, I have no moneys. I can't even buy milk sometimes so how can I afford to feed a babby? Money will always be an issue when it comes to children (unless you're super rich). If I became pregnant now? Sorry to say (but not sorry), I would have to abort it. It wouldn't be fair on the child, on my parents who would be helping me or even the father of the child who isn't ready. I can't understand young parents who are expecting a child through accidental pregnancy to be happy. I think I would be shocked. Some accidents can be happy if this is what you want. Don't get me wrong, children are wonderful. But my mother struggled as a single parent with me for a long time. It was lucky my mother had the help she did. But babies are for life, not for just Instagram or Facebook. 

I see young parents on Facebook and Instagram presenting to the world what they had made. I'm happy for them because they finally look happy within themselves, but I can see what's going to happen in 20 years time. The child will turn 18, have a job/go to university/leave home/have a family of their own, and then the parents think it's now their time to shine and party - because they couldn't do it during their 20s and 30s. They think they're free because their child is now an "adult" but they will always be worrying about them 24/7. You're not free once you have a child. 

Another thing I see is that when mothers come to another mothers or pregnant woman's defense, they always say "Having a baby is the best thing that's ever happened to me." I mentioned this to my friend and he got really annoyed and made an interesting point, "How do they know it's the best thing ever when they've never left this town? They haven't travelled, seen the world, or done anything." 

It put me at ease. When I heard about the complaint about the video, it made me feel guilty for mentioning anything. But this was their choice to have a baby. Of course it's the best thing that ever happened - not much has happened in your life before then. I feel bad now for saying that because what if having a baby really saved them, what if this baby is what they needed all along. And to be honest, I don't feel I have done much with my life either apart from going to university. These women have made a human being! 

I don't know.

I guess they chose this path. Everyone has an opinion and obviously they didn't like mine because they are in a situation I am not ready for - doesn't mean I hate it. These mothers can kick off all they like. They chose this path, they can deal with what's coming. There are worse people than me in this world. And it's the same for me too - I don't want a baby right now and some will disagree with that. Seriously, who cares? They'll see me as a hater and have their whole army of people backing them up. Who cares? Ignore me if you do not like it. I wasn't thinking of you when I did the video blog. Plenty of mothers in Southampton and on my friend's News Feed (who had a pregnant friend who kept putting status' about her poo and sickness problems - ew). My world does not revolve around you. What will putting a Facebook status do? Get 600 likes? With people agreeing with you, making you feel validated? It won't stop me from writing things like this. I have to write articles and blogs like this because this will end up being my job one day. I am trained in writing. I have to make money from this. This isn't even controversial. 

Shall I carry on with my points? Went off there. 

I also love my sleep. At this moment, I would not give up my sleep for a baby. If I had one, then yes, taking care of my baby would be priority number one over my bed, but if someone asks me if I would willingly sacrifice my sleep to have a baby now, I would say you're crazy. 

Which leads on to the next point: I am selfish. Not many admit that. I love sleep. I love eating my own food and taking my time. I can be as spontaneous as I like. I like buying things for myself. What single lady who has no responsibilities wouldn't? 

I do admit, it does sound like I'm bashing all the women that are preggers. I'm not. I just don't like the pregnant women who force the idea of getting up the duff on someone who doesn't want one or isn't ready e.g. just finished uni. I wouldn't force someone to go to university because I did. They can go if they want or perhaps decide to do something else. I would have my input and say I enjoyed it thoroughly and the benefits and they can decide from everyone's experience after. 

But then again, that's how I've been brought up. Everyone in my family have said to go to university to earn more money. People can get jobs and earn money but (apparently) with a degree, you can earn more money. We'll see. Need a job first. 

It's funny, when it was December 31st 2014 - I kept seeing memes on Facebook saying, "Like if you made it through 2014 without a baby!". Of course I found it funny because having no bun in the oven is seen as an achievement. I ended up tagging my friend in it. Hehe. Then I saw the comments and it was mothers stating that the women who are happy that they made it without a baby are the ones getting drunk all the time, having one-night stands and do not know the true meaning of happiness because they do not have a baby. 

ERRRRRM.... What? I don't get drunk (even though I should at this age) and I don't have one-night stands (I'm in a long term relationship with a loving boyfriend) so actually ladies, I'm responsible and I am trying to get education together (waaa), thank you. Not all women who don't get pregnant are not like how you described. And I still don't want a baby now - however you make it sound like raindrops and unicorn poop.  

I'm not hating on young mothers, by the way (eek some convincing is needed). My mother was one, and without her, I wouldn't be here but she was ready for a family. It was all she ever wanted: to be married and have kids. If I ever had a baby now, I think I would end up resenting myself for not fulfilling my 20s and 30s with experiences and stories. Basically, I want to get everything out of my system and live life to the fullest and then settle. Because when I settle, I want to have all of my attention on my children and taking care of my husband, because I would be (hopefully) sorted out financially, have a home, a good job and have so many stories to tell people one day. I watch AprilAthena7 on YouTube and a fan queried her about starting a family and April had the perfect answer - it was diplomatic and it made sense. If you want my answer just watch that video.

Also, here is the last reason: I want to avoid the Asian mother feeling disappointed. It would dishonour my family and my cow. 

PS If you see spelling mistakes, it's intended. 

Video Blogging So Far...

So I've been doing this last October and I'm still not sure what to think of it.

I love the editing aspect of it. Still getting used to talking in front of the camera and also when there's people in the house which is why I usually do it when they're out. 

It's hard to think about what to video blog about and then make it sound really interesting. I also don't know who watches my videos or if anybody does. Actually, I know some of my friends do and it's quite unusual or embarrassing when they say things from my video that I've said or call me their "Favourite YouTuber". They're taking the piss, I know. Don't see myself as one. Probably won't ever. 

But because I don't know who is watching, I don't know what to record or whether they like it. 

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO TALK ABOUT! [>.<] 

I know from various YouTubers that I follow that it can take a long time to get anywhere. I don't mind right now. I've been doing this along with final year of uni so my uni work would take priority of course - but then again it's all about time management. 

Another issue is that my voice can be monotone. The worst sound to listen to is your voice and I'm not very fond of it. 

Anyway, I'll carry on vlogging because it's another platform I can expand to. I'll see how it goes. 

TTFN. 

Live In The Moment. Leave The Phone.

Everywhere you look, there is a person on their phone.

I am guilty of this. My mother is even more guilty of this. I have to call her name 20 times over a 10 minute period before I get a response. 

People are not connected to reality. Facebook. Instagram. BBC News. Candy Crush. It seems as though everybody is addicted to their phones. If I ever asked my parents to stay away from their phone for a day, they'll get the shakes. It's funny. 

Phones are brilliant for capturing the moment, but it is also about living in the moment and so far, we miss a lot of what's going on. 

I once left my phone at home by accident and it actually felt liberating. I do recommend it, however, you'll need to wear a watch and come up with another way of people contacting you for the day. 

So why not? Turn your phone off and see what happens. 

Things That Happen On Trains.

I travel on trains frequently and when a situation occurs, my mind goes into overload and think things that you wouldn't say in public. Funny things, obviously.

WARNING: May contain swearing, judging, hunger, impatience, lots of exclamation marks and capitalisation.

Enjoy.

#1 WHEN YOU CAN'T UNDERSTAND THE MAN OVER THE TANNOY
Man: Welcome aboard the South West train service to London Waterloo. There has been a slight delay due to a gidnfbhjvdnsasdkjfnadjfbnvajsdfbnvjdafnb.

Mind: Eh? What did he say? WHAT'S DA DELAY?

Man: ...Thank you for your patience.

Mind: OI GET BACK HERE! I DIDN'T HEAR WHAT YOU SAID!

Mind: GURL, this better not make me miss breakfast hour at McDonalds. 

#2 WHEN A SMELLY PERSON SITS NEXT TO YOU
Man: Can I sit here please?

Mind: NOPE.

Mouth: Of course.

Mind: Dammit, why are we British too polite?!

Mind: Oh god, he stinks.

Mind: Is my perfume on me? (Rummages through bag, item not found)... NOOOOO!

Mind: Oh my god, am I gonna die? Is this how I die? Suffocation of bad odour?

Mind: The windows aren't open. I'm gonna kill somebody.

Mind: Hold. Your. Breath.

Mind: Why don't they provide oxygen masks on trains like they do on planes? THIS IS AN EMERGENCY SITUATION!

Mind: Is he moving?

Mind: OMG it's his stop!

Mind: But he's left his smell behind.

Mind: NOOOOOO!

#3 WHEN SOMEONE SITS NEXT TO YOU AND FALLS ASLEEP TRAPPING YOU IN
Mind: Aww aren't they cute sleeping?

Mind: Wait, they're sleeping?

Mind: No, no, no don't fall asleep!

Mind: Are they asleep?

Mind: Knew I should've sat on the outside.

Mind: Shall I tap them? Is it rude to wake them up?

Mind: OMGMYSTOPISNEXTOMGMYSTOPISNEXTOMGMYSTOPISNEXT

Mind: Well, that's final then. I'm off to Scotland. 

#4 CARRYING LOTS OF BAGS AFTER SHOPPING AND TRYING TO FIND A SEAT
Mind: Wow, it's busy today.

Mind: Oh god there's so many people.

Mind: Right, easy does it Isobel.

Victim #1: Ow!

Mouth: SORRY!

Mind: Oh god I just hit an old granny! I hope that didn't hurt too much.

(LIFTS BAGS HIGHER)

Victim #2: Oh Jesus! (Moves out of the way)

Mind: Eeek eek sorry, sorry, sorry! Why did I decide to go shopping today?!

(A FOOD TROLLEY COMES ALONG)

Mind: What the fuck, well bitch I ain't moving.

(A FEW SECONDS LATER)

Mind: Ok, I'll move. 

#5 NO SEATS/ROOM ON TRAIN SO RESORTED TO STANDING OUTSIDE THE TOILET
Mind: Jeez, I hope no one needs the toilet, they can hold it in right?

Mind: Nope, someone's going in, someone must hate me right now.

(STANDS OUT OF THE WAY, PERSON GOES IN)

(10 MINUTES PASS)

Mind: They've been in there for a while. They better not be doing a shit.

(HEARS THE TOILET FLUSH)

Mind: Oh god hold your breath.

(PERSON COMES OUT LOOKING EMBARRASSED AND WADDLES AWAY)

Mind: They didn't close the door!

Mind: Oh god, I held my breath too early I NEED TO BREATHE

(I LET GO AND STARTING BREATHING)

Mind: OH MY FUCKING GOD IT STINKS! And I can't move on this sardine train!

(SHUTS THE TOILET DOOR, A FEW SECONDS LATER ANOTHER PERSON WALKS IN)

Mind: Yup, someone is really hating on me right now.

#6 WHEN PASSENGERS STARE AT YOU
Mind: Eh? Is that person looking at me?

Mind: Oh dear lord they're looking.

Mind: Do I have something on my face? (Looks at phone quickly) Nope nothing.

Mind: Maybe it's something next to me? (Looks out the window) Nope, just trees.

Mind: Oh dear they're still looking.

Mind: So rude to stare...they can't be British

Mind: Do I stare back? Is this some sort of war going on that I'm not aware of?

Mind: This is a serious case of being a weirdo.

Mind: Fuck it, let's glare back. 

Mind: Nope, they haven't budged.

Mind: Maaaaaan, I must be fine looking today (Looks at phone again) Nope that's not it.

Mind: Ok they're still staring. Right that's it. I'm going to say something.

(TRAIN STOPS AND PERSON GETS OFF AT DESTINATION)

Mind: Ok, maybe not.

#7 OVERHEARING A GIRL FLIRTING WITH A BOY
Mind: Mate, this is cringey. 

Mind: What is she wearing?

Mind: She's only 16? Don't think she should be wearing a skirt that short.

Mind: Bloke seems alright, reciprocating back to her.

Mind: Oh my god, was that her laugh? Was that her flirty laugh?

Mind: Oh my god, was I like this at 16?

Mind: Jeez, I hope not.

Mind: Oh hang on wait...yeah I think I was.

Mind: Wow, that's embarrassing looking back.

Mind: You what mate? You're into weird shit? Should you be telling a guy this? Should I be listening to this anymore?

Mind: Fuck it, I've got another 10 minutes on this train.

#8 DISLIKE OF USING TRAIN TOILETS
Mind: Oh dear, I really need the toilet...

Mind: Dammit body, why do you want to do a number two at this very moment?! WHY NOT AT HOME?

Mind: Breathe, breathe. It's alright, only an hour on the train.

Mind: But can I really hold it in that long?

Mind: This. Is. Uncomfortable.

Mind: Shall I go to the toilets on the train?

Mind: Hmm, I could go...

Mind: Oh god, what if the train leaves without me?

Mind: Nope. Not going.

#9 WHEN OVERHEARING A TEENS CONVERSATION
Mind: Oh? What are they talking about? 

Mind: Fifty Shades? Whipping? Canes?

Mind: Oh bless, they think they know what they're talking about.

Mind: Jeez, why are they so loud? I'm sure the old lady near them doesn't want to hear about butt plugs.

Mind: Or does she? HAHAHAHA.

Mind: Blimey, why are there so many of them? 

Mind: Why is that girl trying to sound older by talking about sex out loud?

Mind: She's annoying.

Mind: Stop talking, please. You've probably never touched a willy in your life. 

Mind: Oh dear god, the whole carriage is going to know about what you get up to within these 20 minutes.

Mind: Do you know what? Why don't you ask the ticket man whether you can speak over the tannoy, it wouldn't make a difference at the volume you're speaking at. 

Mind: Man, I sound grumpy. Am I on my period this week?

Mind: Nope. I'm just hungry. Get me off this train. 

#10 SEEING A COUPLE SHOWING PDA
(COUPLE SITS IN TWO SEATER NEAR ME)

Mind: Aww they seem cute.

Mind: Lalalalalalalalalalala....oh looking they're kissing.

(LOOKS OUT THE WINDOW)

Mind: Oh dear, this seems awkward.

(LOOKS BACK)

Mind: Oh wow, they're really going for it and they've only been on the train for a minute.

Mind: Wonder where they are going?

Mind: Shit man, it's like they haven't seen each other in a while.

Mind: Oh my god, why am I looking? QUICK LOOK AT PHONE!

Mind: Do they know I'm here?  

Mind: Oh my...

Mind: I hope I'm not part of some voyeurism shit.

Mind: ....Are they still kissing?

Mind: Well. Yup. That's what my eyes see. He's groping her boob. Nope. Boobs. Plural. 

Mind: Maybe he was trying to grab her face and it accidentally slipped. I DON'T KNOW IT COULD HAPPEN! I WASN'T WATCHING.

Mind: Eeeek, they're making noises. 

(LOOKS OUT THE WINDOW AGAIN)

Mind: Yup, this is what I'm gonna have to do for the rest of the journey.

Mind: Hmm, I wonder what I shall have for lunch.

(GOES THROUGH TUNNEL)

Mind: Oh god the windows have gone black. OMG I can see them in the reflection.

Mind: I CAN'T ESCAPE THEM!

Mind: When this is over, I'm going blog about this shit. 

Piglet: How Do You Spell Love? ------------------ Pooh: You Don't Spell It, You Feel It.

In a relationship? Want to spread the news on how happy you are and how fantastic your partner is? Of course you do. But when does it start bordering on annoying, in which you then begin questioning why they keep doing it?

There are many people on Facebook who gush about their boyfriend/girlfriend or post the occassional "I love you" on their partner's wall for all the world to see, depicting a very lovey-dovey couple that we would imagine. But then I wonder if it is something much deeper like a cover up because most people do that in order to maintain a illusion that their relationship is somewhere far from okay.

And what if they are okay? Well, then I start to question other platform of communication e.g. text, WhatsApp, Facebook Messenger, Skype, a phone call - Are they all broken? Do they not fit your means of standard whereby you have to post how much you love them online? Why does the whole world need to see you write three affectionate words in such a public manner?

Sure you get the exceptions - i.e. my parents - I have to let these guys off to be honest, they are my parents after all. They are one of the soppiest human beings I know - My mum puts up love quotes [one a day for all those lucky people who are friends with her, two if she's generous] dedicated to my father and he reciprocates the feelings through YouTube videos featuring love songs from their decade. It's sweet really with the given nicknames such as "Boo Boo" aka my dad, but my exposure to their fairytale doesn't stop there - they smooch, cuddle and laugh at each other and I can see, that they are happy online and also behind the scenes.

But what about the couples who aren't happy as they seem online? I know a few couples who argue all the time and not at all that happy within their relationship due to the mounting of issues and yet, they still post about how happy they are. Is it denial that's happening? With that many people apparently knowing how content you are, is it just maintaining that facade, in case of letting them down? We will never know. 

People who brag about how amazing their partner is on a daily/weekly basis do get noticed, but only when it stops. There's nothing more strange than a couple, who were soppy as hell a week ago, have now disappeared from your newsfeed. Of course we get worried because we haven't heard from them in what seems like years and so, the next step after getting all hot and bothered is to check out their profile, and a majority of the time, lo' and behold, they've broken up. Ah! An answer!
Right, this is why you don't publicly declare your love all the time, people won't take notice when you're typing away saying "I love you so much, you're my world, you're my everything" when in fact your partner is actually in earshot of you saying it, instead the user's attention would be focused on your lack of presence online.

This reminds me of when Peter and I went on holiday to Gran Canaria last year and there was this young couple who arrived the same time as us and we saw them by the pool and at dinner everyday, and the one thing that they always did was kiss. Never separated. They were act it like teens - and there were bloody children around as well. It was just fascinating watching them kiss non-stop, and then, we saw them one evening and they weren't kissing! Me and Peter were so baffled, we wondered whether they were feeling ill. We noticed that when they weren't kissing, they looked miserable. They didn't look too happy eating food either. And if they're not happy eating food with their loved one beside them, then they are not truly happy. Food and sex makes everybody happy. Yah?

Anyway, it can get annoying. The thing is, people don't need to see how amazing your boyfriend/girlfriend is by spamming it online daily - that's not #1 priority. My boyfriend and I don't send each other things like that online, it's more of a private matter when sending our love - i.e. phone calls/messenger. Unless it's our anniversary so I'll put something up once a year. Which is coming up, so beware. 

Another thing is what about your single friends on Facebook? How do they feel? Consider those who don't have a partner. Sure it might be their choice that they want to eat Ben & Jerry's alone but then again, what if they are trying to find love but failing? It can be hard for some. 

*Sigh* What I'm trying to say is, don't spread your love to prove something - people will see through it. And try not to make statements that you're going to be "2Getha 4Eva" - you're not teenagers anymore. Perhaps I'm too cynical - I do adore a love story but there's a point where we are all going to overdose from it on Facebook.  

Also, I found this though. Credit to Sarcasm_Only on Instagram. 

Therefore, if you break up - people would not suspect a thang! 

Happy August everyone!

Is Facebook Our New Best Friend?

We treat Facebook as the only source of communication and a form of escapism. It's our little sidekick tucked into the comforts of our pocket or our handbag - well, until we whip it out because apparently we have something the whole world needs to hear. Facebook asks their users on the status tab 'What's on your mind?' but is this sort of encouragement ever a good idea? 

The Problems
Users will treat this as one way of being social, but are we really being that social in a way that we would rather talk to our friends through a messenger, than to their face? Has Facebook somehow made us anti-social at the same time? I think so. 

The "social" networking site relies on people saying what's on their mind, sharing their business and one of the results is 'likes'. The importance of how many 'likes' you get is pretty high. One easy click is enough to make the user think that whatever they say, confirms their importance in your life (perhaps) - therefore whatever they say is gold. The more likes you get, the more popular you seem. 

However, users checking every 15 minutes to see how many 'likes' they have can take over one's life. But it's not just the 'likes' that keeps their attention away from reality - it's also their nosiness and Facebook "stalking". If their face wasn't always so glued to their phone, their attention would be on someone else (e.g. girlfriend, boyfriend, mother, father, teacher, daughter, son, dog) and that's how it should be, but instead they feel ignored and lost. No point trying to talk to them thinking they are listening because 10 minutes later when their face is no longer a glowing blue, you get the delayed 'Huh?'.

Another issue is the sharing. I know it's there for friends and family to give an insight into your life if you don't see each other very often, but what about the people you never speak to or see at all? All they're doing now is being nosey buggers. Why are they on your friends list in the first place? But if people do see their friends or family, what are they going to talk about? Nothing. The conversation would usually start off as "Oh, saw that status of yours on Facebook" or "Nice holiday photos". 

You see, when this site wasn't available to us, people would meet up with their friends that they hadn't seen in a while and produce actual photographs of whatever they've been up to, for instance, a holiday. They would spend hours going through the photos in the flesh and the meeting would be an actual catch up. But now, everything is online. Everyone can see. No need to ask. They're like the acquaintance who knows everything. Even what time you take a shit. 

Deleting/unfollowing people has been quite liberating and I've done it for these reasons:
1) I don't talk to them.
2) They don't talk to me.
3) Random people.
4) Reunion - If I ever had one in 10 years time, can you imagine how silent the room would be because everyone knows everything about you? 
5) They talk absolute rubbish.

Point #5 is a big one. People moan a lot on Facebook. They treat it as their diary. What they say is really pointless too (e.g. "I hate Mondays" - Why? 'Cos everyone else does?) and it's unnecessary information cluttering my newsfeed. I sound like a grumpy moo and I don't mind status', that's the point of Facebook. But some reveal too much, repeat themselves or go on and on about some shit. I did some research and here are some of the most commonly seen status':

• Selfies
• I'm always ill
• I'm always depressed
• Copying cheesy quotes
• The 'Like for Hot or Not'
• I'm always drunk snaps
• Holiday photos - These aren't bad
• Cars
• 'I Hate Mondays'
• Soppy relationship posts about/to another
• I'm always skint
• Baby photos, followed by an engagement
• Food photos - Some look ok, some make me drool bad
• God
• "Granddad, you've been gone for 8 years, 2 months, 5 days and 3 hours. We miss you." - I may be steering towards insensitive here but this isn't Facebook material. Should be mourned in private
• Just pure moaning. Imagine if Moaning Myrtle had Facebook. She'd have no friends.

I'm not totally innocent though, I do the odd food photo or selfie but that's like once in a blue moon - I think, I could be lying. But the others? Who needs this crap? Some crap is good though, the baby photos are adorable and I love seeing where people have travelled around the world, but the rest is kinda blah. People use Facebook as a ground to stand on to see what we have in common with these people. And most of the time, it's just funny memes that connect people to one another which is really cool. Other times, it's just people not happy with their lives and it seems like friends don't have the heart to delete them on Facebook because they want to hear the gossip - the "What's up hun? Message me" crap goes on automatic. You what mate? If you were that close in the first place, he or she would've been the first people you would've contacted, instead of resorting to a site full of strangers. They don't need to know, will your news affect them? Probably not, unless it's close family but then you would keep the issue private. These people should get paid for the amount of status' they put up or how much they reveal daily.

The Benefits
However, Facebook is not all doom and gloom, it has its positives too. The sharing part is also great if you don't see family/friends who are either abroad or immobile (e.g flu or old), especially the elderly who probably find getting to places and seeing people a struggle.

It's a good platform to start up friendships that you thought would never happen, for instance, classmates you never spoke to at school is now classed as your best friend, 20 years on.

It's also good for exposing your work that needs that little 'oomph' in the world. Many use Facebook to create an image for themselves through promotional pages or sharing links to an external site, for example, a blog. We need to start somewhere and the internet is an easy platform to begin with. I do need the internet and Facebook for the field of work that I want to go into but I don't want to be glued like when I was younger. I had my teenage years of experiencing technology - I will admit, MSN and Bebo were my life, I was obsessed and looking back, I realise I was very engrossed in my phone and didn't make any conversations with my family. That realisation scared me because I have wasted so many years just being attached to my phone and being the internet.

Overall?
Facebook should be about sharing your good news, funny shit and joy, but then again, who's going to feed off that? Society likes to get their energy and kick off the depressed and unsuccessful. Sad eh? It needs to change.

Sharing your achievements in your life so far can also be rewarding when people take notice - like it was worth it. But you don't need to rely on people to congratulate you - if you feel good within yourself, you don't need that seal of approval from people you don't know. You would know it within yourself. You just share the news because you feel so happy. Whether you get likes or not. It's just a middle finger up to self doubt, like confirmation.

All I just want to say, after all this mumbling, is that Facebook isn't your life. Yes, you include it into your daily routine like brushing your teeth but I think people need to be desensitised about Facebook because right now, it's treated as one big show. And we're its puppets. 

My Teenage Years Vs My Little Sisters

There is 8 years difference between me and sister. Only 8 years but you wouldn't be able to tell - she's the same height as me. She's 13 at the moment (turning 14 in August) and since she's now classed as a teen, I've realised that she won't be having the same experiences that I had gone through. Here's a few:

• MSN - This messenger was our life! The one thing that stood out was the emoticons that replaced every single word. Such an effort to read.

• Internet - Today, we have WiFi. Back then, we had this cable shit where we had to share this singular wire that would only provide internet for one computer at a time. Tough times. 

• Flip phones - Actually, forget the flip phones, I remember the BRICKS. Thick ass phones that resembled a shoe. And then flip phones came into fashion and I loved them. You drop your flip phone? Only the outside is scratched. You drop your iPhone? Everything is broke. Loooong gone. 

• MP3 and CD players - I loved my little MP3 - None of that error shit I get with my iPhone when I want to put music on. A bugger carrying portable CD players though. And carrying the actual CD too. That's why mother's bags are so big - they be carrying all those Cee-Deeees. 

• Limewire - This was the software where you would download free music illegally. I could download anything from it. Whereas now with iTunes if I wanted a song, it's harder now due to availability. Limewire made things accessible.

• 90s - This ranges from music (like Britney, Backstreet Boys, Celine Dion ballads, Aqua) to fashion (like Jelly shoes). Hairstyles count too.

• Bebo - Started in 2005, this became THE social media site to be on. Like Facebook, but quirkier. The skins were amazing. Made all of mine on Paint. So hard. 

• Racism - Witnessing my sister going to Primary and now Secondary school, I think the racism has toned down and much better than when I was at school. I loathed Primary school. I didn't like going - I had to face daily racism from stupid people - ranged from people not sitting next to me to boys mimicking karate moves in front of me. All because of my race. It was sad. I never told my mother. They made me feel ashamed that I was Chinese. I know now that I should have told my mother - I was only under 11 when these things happened. I shouldn't have fought it alone. So when my sister went to Primary, I was very wary and felt over-protective of her because of what I went through. I still am. Only last year she had a couple of boys racially abuse her and of course, we stepped in. 

• Innocence - I've heard various stories that girls this young have had intercourse, doing drugs and smoking - You what mate? At 13, I played with Tamagotchis and collected Pokemon cards. They want to grow up too fast. 

• Chalkboards - Messy as fuck. Makes you look like you've been raiding the crack cupboard when the chalk powder goes all over the place.

There's probably more that I have missed out but these are the things that stood out for me. It's just weird how times change. And my little baby is growing up so fast. Waaa.