"DAAANG, MY STATUS AIN'T EVEN ABOUT YOU."

Facebook is the root of all evil....Because of the people on it! I don't write status' because it seems like effort to update everyone on what time I'm pooping. For those who update regularly (like my parents), their status' can be taken the wrong way. Why? Because minds go into overload and think it is directed at them or somebody. No. Our world does not revolve around you so stop flattering yourselves. 

Why do people assume? It could be because of: stalking, boredom, crazy women, affairs, speculation, inferiority complex, threatened, odd activity - or just gossip to shorten it. 

There's no privacy on Facebook anymore and people assume they have the right to know everything in your personal life. Well I guess if people are willing to open up their lives to Facebook then I can't see why they complain when they want privacy or get annoyed if their status is read differently. Stop putting stupid status' up then. It goes both ways. 

People won't speculate if you don't put anything up. 

Should You Act Your Age?

I am currently 22-years-old and to be honest, I do not feel it. 

I still feel like a kid: I play games, watch cartoons, loved being fed by family (then again, who doesn't?), and I'm not in the mind set of a person who should be working full-time sometime this year. But how am I supposed to act? I graduate this year and yet, I feel like I'm not ready for anything. I've been in education since I was 4 and I'm supposed to land a job soon after my degree. *sigh* 

Don't get me wrong, I can't wait. It's a new adventure to me but it means that I have to be an "adult". Am I ready to be an adult yet? How do you BE an adult? What if I don't want to be one? Hmm, well I guess there are already aspects that make me one: I buy adult train tickets, family members are getting really old, I have to feed myself, and sort out bills. I don't understand rent and bills still but unfortunately, no going back. 

I sometimes feel small or "unknowledgeable" when I'm around with other "adults" who talk about, let's say, politics, finance or tax. I don't know much about the topics, which is sad because I feel like I should by now. Should we have been taught this at school, college or university? Or should I have taken the initiative and Googled everything? 

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! WHAT DO I DO?!

Hmph. I don't know how I should act or what I should know by this age. I look at people and think, "How did you go from laughing at poop to running the country?" But then I see plenty of other people who haven't grown up, so it makes me feel okay. Maybe we never grow up. I'm cool with that, as long as I have common sense (and money, job, love, family, Disney and video games). I will never do some things the "adult" way. AND NO I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO AFTER UNI STILL! Leave meeeeeeee.

To be continued...

Live In The Moment. Leave The Phone.

Everywhere you look, there is a person on their phone.

I am guilty of this. My mother is even more guilty of this. I have to call her name 20 times over a 10 minute period before I get a response. 

People are not connected to reality. Facebook. Instagram. BBC News. Candy Crush. It seems as though everybody is addicted to their phones. If I ever asked my parents to stay away from their phone for a day, they'll get the shakes. It's funny. 

Phones are brilliant for capturing the moment, but it is also about living in the moment and so far, we miss a lot of what's going on. 

I once left my phone at home by accident and it actually felt liberating. I do recommend it, however, you'll need to wear a watch and come up with another way of people contacting you for the day. 

So why not? Turn your phone off and see what happens. 

Things People Say To Me Because I'm Chinese: Part One.

I forget sometimes that I'm Chinese because I have other things on my mind, which is why it's lovely to have people point it a lot *sarcasm*. Here are some classics I have encountered throughout my 22 years. Some are hilarious, others you think 'WTF?'

#1 
Friend: What's Szechuan Chicken?

Me: Um, I don't know.

Friend: But you own a takeaway?

Me: We don't sell it there.

Friend: Oh, you're useless then.

Me: .....

#2
Me: To be honest, I'm not that good at Maths.

Friend: But you're Chinese?

#3
Friend: Urgh, why are you dipping toast in hot chocolate?

Me: Because it's tasty.

Friend: Is that a Chinese thing you do?

Me: No, it's French. 

#4
Me: (Finished talking on the phone to my family in Chinese/Hakka)

Friend: Were you speaking in Chinese?

Me: Yes.

Friend: Oh, thought it didn't sound like English. What were you saying like ching-chong wah chong?

Me: .....(That's not how Chinese sounds)

#5
Random person: Are you related to Jackie Chan?

#6
Friend: Why are your eyes so big?

#7
Random person I just met: Also, I know a bit of Tai Chi and Kung Fu.

Me: Um, I don't do that, sorry. (Again, not related to Jackie Chan).

#8
Friend: ISOBEL! You're Chinese!

Me: (Very observant)

#9 
Vietnamese girl: Hi, where are you from?

Me: Devon.

VG: No, I mean originally.

Me: Well my grandparents are from Hong Kong.

VG: Oh, cool. I have friends from Hong Kong. 

Me: Oh, that's nice.

We stop talking.

#10
Friend: No offence but those ramen noodles don't look nice, which is why I don't fancy Chinese men either.

Me: Um, I'm a bit confused, how does the food and men link together??

#11
Me: So I ordered steak with Diane sauce but I didn't realise it had mushrooms in it.

Friend: You don't like mushrooms?

Me: No.

Friend: But you're Chinese? You're supposed to like mushrooms? I thought that was the stereotype that Chinese people like mushrooms?

Me: (First time I've ever heard of that one).

#12
Friend: What does this say?

Me: (Looks at Chinese character they're pointing at). Don't know. I can't read Chinese.

Friend: Oh. How are you even properly Chinese?

#13 
(Dad comes back with sausage and chips takeaway through the shop)

Customer: You guys eat sausage and chips?! I thought you only eat Chinese food because you're Chinese?

Me: (Well what about you? You're English and you're about to eat Chinese food).

#14
Person: Can you teach me some Chinese?

#15
Jehovah Witness: (Starts speaking to me in Mandarin).

Me: Sorry I don't speak Mandarin.

JW: (Carries on speaking in Mandarin).

Me:......

#16
And then there's the boyfriend.

Boyfriend: I was in town earlier and saw a black guy and a white girl holding hands, and I thought "You don't see many interracial relationships around here" and then I remembered that I was in one.

Me: *Face Palm*

At the end of the day, you can't take these comments seriously. Some of them you have to laugh at because of how ridiculous they are. 

People don't think before they speak, or they expect you to know everything from your culture. It does test you sometimes because you can't believe what you had just heard. It's usually the same comments and they mean no harm. 

I've had this for most of my life and so have my family members. You just think they're either curious or just plain dumb. 

PS friends who say these - I know they mean no malice, it's curiosity. Plus, these comments make really good content.

PART TWO WILL BE SOON. 

What Defines Us Is How Well We Rise After Falling

I follow a YouTube channel called JK News, a news style channel where they express their opinions over articles sent by subscribers and I consider myself a fan. I have watched all of their videos and agree with what they have to say.

In the new video, however, "Bully Asks Girl He Once Tormented On Date But Gets Rejected", I felt really disappointed. In this story, it was about a female university student who was bullied for three years by this boy back in Year 8. Now 22, she got asked out by the boy over Facebook. It said her first instinct was to say "no" but due to what he did to her, she decided to accept the date and stand him up and leave him a picture of her 13-year-old self and a note saying if he remembered her and what he did affected her. Basically scolding him and making him feel bad.

JK News response? One member kept calling her a "loser", "unevolved" and "immature" and that everyone gets picked on. Yes, it's true, everybody gets picked on during their life but this girl was bullied for THREE years. That's some serious picking. Why were they justifying his actions? Yes, he was in school when he did it but bullies never consider how the victims feel. It lead to the girl developing an eating disorder because he kept calling her fat. 

I had to check the comment section underneath and of course, there was a hoard of people expressing their disgust at what that one member said. It was mainly by the people who have been bullied before and it was really insightful in what they had to say. Bullying can affect people in so many ways and it depends on how they handle it. 

I thought JK News would be more open minded than this since they probably got bullied too when they were younger and yet, they're making bullying seem like a side issue and making the girl seem like she was in the wrong. They were even laughing about it. I don't understand. They said that she shouldn't hold a grudge for that long and plan that "revenge" and "to get over it". The part I agree on is the revenge and grudge bit, but I wouldn't call it revenge. That boy, between the ages of 13-16, made her feel like utter shit. He would've been old enough to know what he was doing by 16. 

That note she wrote to him was a way of validating herself. Her self worth was probably quite low and now that he wanted to date her, she is now worthy of his "kinder" side. It was all about looks for him. What a shitbag. Kids can be absolutely horrible if another child is "fat" or "ugly" but what children don't know is that looks fade and some take longer to become a beauty and it seems like she has blossomed into a swan. Also, I don't think she planned to set revenge on this guy for 10 years, it seems like seeing him brought up bad memories and she just wanted closure and an apology. 

However, children that young don't understand what they're doing. They don't think about the consequences. It was also possible that he was in a group of friends when he did bully her, so he would have that pack mentality. Still, the parents should teach them not to bully too. I do agree that people can change over the years and become a better person, but it doesn't stop the victim from feeling bitter from what they had experienced. 

"To get over it", like I said, many would handle it in a different way, but getting over it isn't simple. Many suffer from psychological trauma from it, causing a lot of issues later on in life. 

This story hit me because a similar experience happened to me. It felt quite real. I was racially bullied when I was primary school, along with being called ugly many times. Of course, I felt pretty low and thought there was something wrong with me. I still remember the people who did it today. Seriously, no matter how old you are, you will always remember the people who made part of your life shit. So if i was in that girl's shoes, I would have turned him down flat. Too much effort on planning to stand him up. 

However, I actually applaud the girl for standing up to him. He does not deserve her time. 

Here is the video. It is the first story.

Dear Ex-Best Friend...

I will have to try and get my memory working because I cannot remember who my best friends were back then. It's been a long time since having a best friend and a lot of people have left my life so remembering is difficult, but here are some of the reasons that may have happened.

1) We drifted apart
So common when one of us either go to a different college, university, a new circle of friends or we can't be bothered anymore. With me going to university and you guys behind and getting a full-time job, it was inevitable.

2) You are a bitch
There is a reason why I cut you out of my life. I don't need this crap in my life. All negativity and it's very much high school mentality. I'm not getting any younger and I don't want to be dealing with it. 

3) I was a bitch
I'm no saint either. I will happily admit that. Reasons for being a bitch? I guess I was young and naive, and if everybody around you is having a bitch-fest, you'll be persuaded to join in. But I've learnt my lesson since school. If anything now, for the people who know me really well, I'm a funny bitch. BETCH. 

4) The boyfriend or girlfriend
It was probably your first time having a serious partner, and so you spent all of your time with them. I don't blame you. I was in that situation before too. It's a new experience and you'd want to soak it up as much as possible, but that means leaving your friends behind too. I guess this can be part of 'drifting apart'. It's also not great being the third wheel either. 

5) More than friends
Having feelings for your best friend is a tricky one. I think there has been plenty of times where I have had feelings for my male best friend but he didn't feel the same, or he liked me but I didn't. And then of course, you have to distance yourself for things not to get weird, but things do get weird because you're not talking. AAAH! Complicated.

6) You had a new best friend
That moment of feeling abandoned for another friend is a pretty shit feeling. Everyone who had a best friend has experienced the "Who is this bitch taking my bestest friend in the whole world away from me?" But then you realise your best friend doesn't see you as her most closest anymore and it's a really sad moment in time. You get left out and you don't know what to do, but you move on with new friends. I felt down when that happened, only because of all those years spent together was thrown away. 

7) We let each other down
When something has happened or we're at a different stage in life, we weren't there for each other. A sad confession I'd like to make is that when I don't want to be your friend anymore, I don't actually fully tell you - I ignore you or say politey why we shouldn't be friends until you get the point. It is the shittiest way to do it, which is why naturally drifting apart makes things easier. I don't like confrontations and I think ending a friendship can be as hard as ending a romantic relationship. 

However, if it is about someone who has turned nasty, I feel they don't deserve my explanation. They should know within themselves why the friendship has ended, unless they think they're a saint. Then they're delusional. 

I think my list can go on and on. And you know the saying "Boyfriends Come And Go But Friends Are Forever"? Not true. One can easily go as much as the other. 

You know what is definitely forever? Family. 

Vlogging Time

So I have just started video blogging which is a scary step because I don't feel I belong in front of the camera but I thought I'd give it a try. It's going okay at the moment. Editing is really fun, but it means I have been ignoring this blog for a while now so hopefully I can balance the two. 

I've recently uploaded Heads Up, Do I Want A Baby Now, Heads Up Bloopers, No Mirror Make Up Challenge and Making Friends (this one hasn't gone up yet) so a few already. I have barely any subscribers so starting out very fresh. 

Heads Up and Heads Up Bloopers
Me and Peter just recorded ourselves playing Ellen Degeneres' game and it's quite an enjoyable game. Obviously you need to know your topics well but it's funnier when you don't. 

Do I Want A Baby Now?
For this one, I basically explained why I don't want a baby at the moment, with examples such as my mother having me young and don't want to repeat history, I love my food and sleep too much to have a child and so on, so nothing controversial really from a view of a 21-year-old. I was worried that some of my pregnant friends (if they ever watched it) were going to take offence but I haven't had any hate so far.... I don't know whether that's a good or a bad thing. 

Anyway, if they did watch it, it was nothing to do with them to be honest, no one in particular. THERE'S SO MANY MOTHERS IN SOUTHAMPTON! I am merely observing my surroundings in my everyday life and saying why I don't want a baby. Simples. 

No Mirror Make Up Challenge
This is where I turn into a clown. I've seen beauty bloggers try this and it looked really fun. So I have no mirror in front of me and I need to try and put make up on. It was really hard. I didn't know where my eyes where. Something similar to this like 'Boyfriend Does My Make Up' will come up in the future.

Making Friends
I haven't uploaded this one up yet, mainly because I don't know how I feel about it still. Of course I have friends in my life but no one really that I'm close to or someone I can have for life, that's what I'm trying to say. It's sort of a sad one, but it's the truth I guess.  

More to come!