Is Facebook Our New Best Friend?

We treat Facebook as the only source of communication and a form of escapism. It's our little sidekick tucked into the comforts of our pocket or our handbag - well, until we whip it out because apparently we have something the whole world needs to hear. Facebook asks their users on the status tab 'What's on your mind?' but is this sort of encouragement ever a good idea? 

The Problems
Users will treat this as one way of being social, but are we really being that social in a way that we would rather talk to our friends through a messenger, than to their face? Has Facebook somehow made us anti-social at the same time? I think so. 

The "social" networking site relies on people saying what's on their mind, sharing their business and one of the results is 'likes'. The importance of how many 'likes' you get is pretty high. One easy click is enough to make the user think that whatever they say, confirms their importance in your life (perhaps) - therefore whatever they say is gold. The more likes you get, the more popular you seem. 

However, users checking every 15 minutes to see how many 'likes' they have can take over one's life. But it's not just the 'likes' that keeps their attention away from reality - it's also their nosiness and Facebook "stalking". If their face wasn't always so glued to their phone, their attention would be on someone else (e.g. girlfriend, boyfriend, mother, father, teacher, daughter, son, dog) and that's how it should be, but instead they feel ignored and lost. No point trying to talk to them thinking they are listening because 10 minutes later when their face is no longer a glowing blue, you get the delayed 'Huh?'.

Another issue is the sharing. I know it's there for friends and family to give an insight into your life if you don't see each other very often, but what about the people you never speak to or see at all? All they're doing now is being nosey buggers. Why are they on your friends list in the first place? But if people do see their friends or family, what are they going to talk about? Nothing. The conversation would usually start off as "Oh, saw that status of yours on Facebook" or "Nice holiday photos". 

You see, when this site wasn't available to us, people would meet up with their friends that they hadn't seen in a while and produce actual photographs of whatever they've been up to, for instance, a holiday. They would spend hours going through the photos in the flesh and the meeting would be an actual catch up. But now, everything is online. Everyone can see. No need to ask. They're like the acquaintance who knows everything. Even what time you take a shit. 

Deleting/unfollowing people has been quite liberating and I've done it for these reasons:
1) I don't talk to them.
2) They don't talk to me.
3) Random people.
4) Reunion - If I ever had one in 10 years time, can you imagine how silent the room would be because everyone knows everything about you? 
5) They talk absolute rubbish.

Point #5 is a big one. People moan a lot on Facebook. They treat it as their diary. What they say is really pointless too (e.g. "I hate Mondays" - Why? 'Cos everyone else does?) and it's unnecessary information cluttering my newsfeed. I sound like a grumpy moo and I don't mind status', that's the point of Facebook. But some reveal too much, repeat themselves or go on and on about some shit. I did some research and here are some of the most commonly seen status':

• Selfies
• I'm always ill
• I'm always depressed
• Copying cheesy quotes
• The 'Like for Hot or Not'
• I'm always drunk snaps
• Holiday photos - These aren't bad
• Cars
• 'I Hate Mondays'
• Soppy relationship posts about/to another
• I'm always skint
• Baby photos, followed by an engagement
• Food photos - Some look ok, some make me drool bad
• God
• "Granddad, you've been gone for 8 years, 2 months, 5 days and 3 hours. We miss you." - I may be steering towards insensitive here but this isn't Facebook material. Should be mourned in private
• Just pure moaning. Imagine if Moaning Myrtle had Facebook. She'd have no friends.

I'm not totally innocent though, I do the odd food photo or selfie but that's like once in a blue moon - I think, I could be lying. But the others? Who needs this crap? Some crap is good though, the baby photos are adorable and I love seeing where people have travelled around the world, but the rest is kinda blah. People use Facebook as a ground to stand on to see what we have in common with these people. And most of the time, it's just funny memes that connect people to one another which is really cool. Other times, it's just people not happy with their lives and it seems like friends don't have the heart to delete them on Facebook because they want to hear the gossip - the "What's up hun? Message me" crap goes on automatic. You what mate? If you were that close in the first place, he or she would've been the first people you would've contacted, instead of resorting to a site full of strangers. They don't need to know, will your news affect them? Probably not, unless it's close family but then you would keep the issue private. These people should get paid for the amount of status' they put up or how much they reveal daily.

The Benefits
However, Facebook is not all doom and gloom, it has its positives too. The sharing part is also great if you don't see family/friends who are either abroad or immobile (e.g flu or old), especially the elderly who probably find getting to places and seeing people a struggle.

It's a good platform to start up friendships that you thought would never happen, for instance, classmates you never spoke to at school is now classed as your best friend, 20 years on.

It's also good for exposing your work that needs that little 'oomph' in the world. Many use Facebook to create an image for themselves through promotional pages or sharing links to an external site, for example, a blog. We need to start somewhere and the internet is an easy platform to begin with. I do need the internet and Facebook for the field of work that I want to go into but I don't want to be glued like when I was younger. I had my teenage years of experiencing technology - I will admit, MSN and Bebo were my life, I was obsessed and looking back, I realise I was very engrossed in my phone and didn't make any conversations with my family. That realisation scared me because I have wasted so many years just being attached to my phone and being the internet.

Overall?
Facebook should be about sharing your good news, funny shit and joy, but then again, who's going to feed off that? Society likes to get their energy and kick off the depressed and unsuccessful. Sad eh? It needs to change.

Sharing your achievements in your life so far can also be rewarding when people take notice - like it was worth it. But you don't need to rely on people to congratulate you - if you feel good within yourself, you don't need that seal of approval from people you don't know. You would know it within yourself. You just share the news because you feel so happy. Whether you get likes or not. It's just a middle finger up to self doubt, like confirmation.

All I just want to say, after all this mumbling, is that Facebook isn't your life. Yes, you include it into your daily routine like brushing your teeth but I think people need to be desensitised about Facebook because right now, it's treated as one big show. And we're its puppets. 

My Teenage Years Vs My Little Sisters

There is 8 years difference between me and sister. Only 8 years but you wouldn't be able to tell - she's the same height as me. She's 13 at the moment (turning 14 in August) and since she's now classed as a teen, I've realised that she won't be having the same experiences that I had gone through. Here's a few:

• MSN - This messenger was our life! The one thing that stood out was the emoticons that replaced every single word. Such an effort to read.

• Internet - Today, we have WiFi. Back then, we had this cable shit where we had to share this singular wire that would only provide internet for one computer at a time. Tough times. 

• Flip phones - Actually, forget the flip phones, I remember the BRICKS. Thick ass phones that resembled a shoe. And then flip phones came into fashion and I loved them. You drop your flip phone? Only the outside is scratched. You drop your iPhone? Everything is broke. Loooong gone. 

• MP3 and CD players - I loved my little MP3 - None of that error shit I get with my iPhone when I want to put music on. A bugger carrying portable CD players though. And carrying the actual CD too. That's why mother's bags are so big - they be carrying all those Cee-Deeees. 

• Limewire - This was the software where you would download free music illegally. I could download anything from it. Whereas now with iTunes if I wanted a song, it's harder now due to availability. Limewire made things accessible.

• 90s - This ranges from music (like Britney, Backstreet Boys, Celine Dion ballads, Aqua) to fashion (like Jelly shoes). Hairstyles count too.

• Bebo - Started in 2005, this became THE social media site to be on. Like Facebook, but quirkier. The skins were amazing. Made all of mine on Paint. So hard. 

• Racism - Witnessing my sister going to Primary and now Secondary school, I think the racism has toned down and much better than when I was at school. I loathed Primary school. I didn't like going - I had to face daily racism from stupid people - ranged from people not sitting next to me to boys mimicking karate moves in front of me. All because of my race. It was sad. I never told my mother. They made me feel ashamed that I was Chinese. I know now that I should have told my mother - I was only under 11 when these things happened. I shouldn't have fought it alone. So when my sister went to Primary, I was very wary and felt over-protective of her because of what I went through. I still am. Only last year she had a couple of boys racially abuse her and of course, we stepped in. 

• Innocence - I've heard various stories that girls this young have had intercourse, doing drugs and smoking - You what mate? At 13, I played with Tamagotchis and collected Pokemon cards. They want to grow up too fast. 

• Chalkboards - Messy as fuck. Makes you look like you've been raiding the crack cupboard when the chalk powder goes all over the place.

There's probably more that I have missed out but these are the things that stood out for me. It's just weird how times change. And my little baby is growing up so fast. Waaa.